today marks the start of my being home alone for the next 3 days. Not a very good start as i feel so fucking lethargic despite sleeping at 10 last night and setting my alarm to go off at 8am. Dragged until 9.30 before i reluctantly dragged my fat arse off the bed. Submittee the socio essay. Adrian tang is a good way to start the day. Especially with his cute smile. I think the effects of the flu med hasn't worn off yet. Sigh. I keep having this 'wanna cry it out because i feel tired' energy in me. But im trying to suppress. I won't cry anymore. Not for stupid things in my life. Well, small happiness do count. I was hungry so heeaded to breadtalk and bought this ham and cheese bread. Omg. Its so yummy it made me smile. Its my official resident bread from now. Mine used to be 'pork floss' or 'bak kwa'bread. Omg. Ham and cheese is so delectable? Its awesome.
Well, i remember telling people last time that when you fall, the world doesn't sympathise with you. Even your close friends who care.. and besides, i refuse to lead a life where people go, "awww shirley. U poor thing". We lead a life of choices. Im fortunate to live in singapore where im able to make decisions on my own accord. I choose to not cry. I choose to study. I choose to remove the stupid things from my life. I don't want to be like some people who are constantly finding people to feel fulfilled. To feel complete. u disgust me. I can be complete as i am.
And also, another lesson to be reminded is, to never ever ever go places u frequent as venues of ur first date.. Next time, if there even is gonna be a next time, it'll be places i'll never visit ever. Maybe pakistan? Or places like jurong island. Maybe even tekong. so at least, u won't always have to be reminded of why your scars were there.
Well, good riddance la. Time to start studying. Not much time left also.
Also, earl grey latte is v v calming.
And to add on, was reading the papers today tabout MM lee saying that, it won't be surprising if opposition wins. PAP losing its quality.. Or people would choose opposition because they want a change. I feel, despite his old age, he is very smart. covering their backside first. Cus i guess, in the coming elections, i'd pretty much speculate that the opposition would grow stronger. Because of mas selamat, v obvious someone was sleeping on his job. Also, ERP. And many bad press releases last year. PAP is definitely weakening in quality. Which means they would decline in power and popularity also. So if in the coming elections, PAP loses more of their power (e.g. In the previous election, pm lee only won by a margin on 66%), they could tell the world/ the press to read the book they published. Something like, not make them look so bad. Well.. Soon to come, perhaps even the civil servants would turn their backs on them also. But as the professor from SMU and something similar MM lee mentioned, if PAP really loses its power, will singapore face the risk of a systemic failure? Since we've been so used to being under the rule of PAP. And not forgetting, the biggest companies (singtel, temasek holdings, wingtai asia, singapore powers) are all under the Lees. Hmm. But i really hope singapore can become a 2 party ruling system in the decade to come. At least, there'll be another voice in parliament. Someone to question the actions. Instead of just conforming to what they say. I mean, honestly, take ERP for example,the aim of ERP was to control the traffic on highways. So when it fails, they increase the prices of ERP. And again and again everytime the same thing happens. But it never eradicates the problem. Honestly, if you already own a car, whether erp rises or not, u still have to use the car to get to work, especially if you worked in places so far from home/ town. i mean, a more practical solution would have to increased the tax on imported cars, so the costs would be passed down to consumers. And when people think its v v expensive to buy cars, they would give up the idea altogether and wouldn't this solve the problem in the long run? well, my voice is only one small voice. So, really hope there'll be another voice in parliament louder than mine to bring these up.
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